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The Sinterklaas survival guide: Nieuwe Sinterklaas liedjes

We don’t need nieuwe Sinterklaas liedjes

The Shallow Man has been feeling pretty depressed this year. The reason for this is that it hurts me to see so many Dutch people being dragged kicking and screaming into the twenty first century. Some minorities have used the rights available to all in the Netherlands to protest against something that many of them find offensive, Zwarte Piet. They’ve been pretty successful in bringing about some minor changes to the event. One of the areas of change is in the traditional Sinterklaas liedjes (songs) that are sung during the season.  According to a poll on AD.nl a staggering 92% of the people polled are against making changes to the traditional Sinterklaas liedjes and as one non-hysterical person commented “ik voel me gediscrimineerd in eigen land”.

Many of you in the expat community will be wondering what all the fuss is about. So on your behalf, the Shallow Man shall bravely step once more into the breach, and provide examples of some old Sinterklaas liedjes along with some new ones.

Now this will no doubt anger some. If as a result, I’m thrown out of Amsterdam and am exiled to live in that most delightful of areas in the Hague, Schilderswijk. I’ll say to my enemies, “I’m from a working class background, this is just like the neighborhood I grew up in, geen probleem, jullie domme kakkers”

The things I do for my readers!

Popular traditional Sinterklaas liedjes

The Dutch don’t like change, which is why they never tip. The Sinterklaas liedjes are what they grew up with, for example here’s a popular one still sung throughout the country today.

Horsing around

Have you ever seen a black man on a horse?

No, no, no, it’s not allowed, I don’t know why, but it just is zo!

If you don’t like this, back to your eigen land you must go,

Sinterklaas is old and fat, and he wears a bloody bishops hat,

He snaps his fingers and Piet comes running just like that,

Piet asked if he could sit on the horse,

Because he’s black and lazy of course,

Sinterklaas said to him,

Have you ever seen a black man on a horse?

No, no, no, it’s not allowed, I don’t know why, but it just is zo!

If you don’t like this, back to your eigen land you must go,

Piet said, but I thought you said I’m not black, it’s soot,

Sint replied, stop being cheeky or your arse will be feeling my foot,

Have you ever seen a black man on a horse?

No, no, no, it’s not allowed, I don’t know why, but it just is zo!

If you don’t like this, back to your eigen land you must go,

 

copyright R. A. Cist 1854

 

Mrs Sneijder

Mrs Sneijder, Mrs Sneijder, Mrs Sneijder is usually a miserable cow,

She’s only happy in December and the neighbors know exactly how,

On the night of the fourth December when her husband is drunk and asleep,

Into the house via a chimney does a not quite black man creep,

Mrs Snyder and the Piet share some terrible habits,

Which includes making love all night like rabbits,

On Sinterklaas day when people see her they say wow!

She’s smiling and happy, no longer such a miserable cow,

Mrs Sneijder, Mrs Sneijder, Mrs Sneijder is usually a miserable cow,

She’s only happy in December and the neighbors know exactly how

volkslied 1869

Suggested new Sinterklaas liedjes

This song should be sung to the music of the Beastie Boys (You Gotta) fight for your right (to party)

 

(You gotta fight) for your right (to tradities)

Quinsy says change Piets appearance and we say no way!

If you don’t like it you should just go away,

It’s onze land, onze kultuur,

If you keep complaining we’re gonna kick down your door,

You gotta fight, for your right,  to black face

You gotta fight, for your right,  to black face

 

He’s not black, he’s a Moor,

He’s also a chimney sweep what are you complaining for?

Your calling us racist that not’s fair,

Just because he has red lips, earrings and curly hair,

90% of us want Piet to stay the same what do you expect?

For us to compromise and show negers some respect?

You gotta fight, for your right,  to black face

You gotta fight, for your right,  to black face

 

copyright 2014 the zwarte piet is GEEN racisme orchestra.

Look how happy the Piets are

The Sinterklaas liedjes

Actually the old and the new Sinterklaas liedjes have their merits. My point of view is why not use both types? Probleem opgelost.

No chimney sweeps were hurt during the writing of this post.

 

Till next time, if the sand is nice and warm, of course you want to keep your head there.

About Simon Woolcot

Infamous blogger, annoyance and self confessed Shallow Man . Simon is a British expat who has lived in Amsterdam for over 11 years, and due to Brexit may soon be applying for asylum. As well as writing this blog, Simon also has a YouTube channel of the same name, writes and directs videos, and hosts seminars about life in the Netherlands

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  • amsshallowman

    I think I prefer the old songs myself, what about you?