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The Many Sins Committed on Dutch Public Transport

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The multitude of sins committed on Dutch public transport

The Shallow Man has in the past created a MEME or two about the wonderful phenomena of Dutch ladies doing their makeup on public transport.

Dutch public transport

 

This has somehow led to the misconception that I have an issue with this. Which is far from the truth. I find the application of makeup on Dutch public transport amusing and a pleasant distraction from the Dutch fashion sins that are often present while commuting. So I was somewhat surprised to receive the following message from Maria Luisa Rosales Gonzalez. A woman that can enter any private party held in a nightclub and pretend to be on the guest list as no Dutch doorman would have the patience to allow her to complete saying her full name. “It’s under Maria Luisa Ros.., ok fine. ENOUGH, just go in”.

 

Dear Shallow Man,

I was wondering why, out of all the things that happen on Dutch public transport, that girls doing their makeup upsets you the most? I, as a busy yet superficial expat, do it quite often, and I even get weird looks from Dutch people. I don’t know if it is because they also get upset by me doing makeup in the train, or simply because they wonder why am I going to a wedding at 8 am, as that is the only reason why I would be wearing makeup in the first place.

It actually takes quite some skill to master the art of drawing onto your face in a moving vehicle. Moreover, there are plenty of things that happen on public transport that are more annoying, actually I compiled a list of them today after I did my make-up on the train:

1. People who put their bags in an empty seat with a crowded train at peak hours

2. People who get upset when you ask them to remove their bag from the empty seat

3. People who pretend they are asleep to not remove their bags from the empty seat

4. People who don’t even have a bag but still take two spots and get upset when asked to move

via GIPHY

5. People who don’t fold their foldable bikes even if the train is super crowded

6. People who stand still on both sides of the escalators because who would be in a hurry at 8 am

Selfish gits of the year

7. People who stare at you creepily in the train

8. Talking about creeps

This page: https://m.facebook.com/HartstochtInDeTrein

9. People who find their way out by literally grabbing your shoulder to push you away

Any NS Train during rush hour.

10. Bus drivers that close the door in your face.

Even when you just ran like crazy and the bus is like 2 minutes early anyways

 

11. Stations that were apparently designed to get as much wind as possible to every single place, even if you are inside

12. Misleading “live updated” bus and tram signs.

Was your bus coming in 2 minutes? Well, now it is 25, because of reasons.

Patiently waiting for my bus. Only five minutes to go.

13. When night trains are replaced by snelbuses that can make the cryptocurrency market look predictable.

When will it come? Will it come? Does it exist?

So in conclusion, doing makeup in the train rocks  (as long as it is not like in this pic)

No ladies doing makeup on public transport in the Netherlands were hurt during the writing of this post.

A big thank you to Maria Luisa Rosales Gonzalez.

 

About Simon Woolcot

Infamous blogger, annoyance and self-confessed Shallow Man. Simon is a British expat who has lived in Amsterdam since 2004. As well as writing this blog, Simon also has a YouTube channel of the same name, writes and directs videos and hosts seminars about life in the Netherlands. He also works as a content marketing and SEO specialist.