Police in Gelderland Issue Fines For Ignoring the Coronavirus Distance and Group Rules

I hope you’re sitting down while reading this, as what I’m about to tell you is shocking!


shocked group of people looking at smartphones

The police have actually enforced a law!


Unless your chosen abode of quarantine is a cave that lacks WIFI and 4G coverage, you’ll surely know about the new rules that came into force on Monday evening. The Dutch government, after a period of Bob Marley style chilled and relaxed behaviour, have introduced a number of rules to slow down the rate of coronavirus infection in the Netherlands.

These include some of the following:

  • People are not allowed to be in groups of more than three if they’re not from the same household
  • It’s mandatory to stay 1.5 meters apart at all times. (Which will come as a blessing to some couples) 😉
  • All events including weddings need to be cancelled until June 1st

It was announced that the authorities would begin handing out fines to people and businesses that break the rules. Now, of course, seeing as how many rules such as cycling through red lights or on pavements, or setting off mini nuclear bombs disguised as fireworks on New Year’s Eve, rarely lead to action by the police, it wasn’t unreasonable to expect that not much would happen in reality.

I fought the law and the law won

So it came as a shock today when in Gelderland, (Google it if you’ve never heard of it) the police broke up a game of football being played by five young men and fined them!


So there you have it. Hell has literally frozen over. Goed zo to the police! If people hadn’t behaved like anti-vaxxers, i.e. acted like selfish morons only thinking about themselves and not society in general, these rules wouldn’t have been necessary.

No science deniers were hurt during the writing of this post.