The Shallow Man Guide to Dating the Dutch

All, my latest book, the Shallow Man Guide to Dating the Dutch is now available to order from and Amazon as an ebook.

Since starting this blog, the Shallow Man has received many questions from readers on dating the Dutch. For this reason, in spite of the risk that producing such a guide will bring to my perfectly dressed self, I’ve decided to put together the only guide you’ll ever need for dating the Dutch. The things I do for my readers!

Learn the answer to such questions as, how to behave on a Tinder date. Why are Dutch women so loud when in a group? Tips for online dating, also read real-life stories from followers of my blog on their experiences of the Dutch dating scene. The Shallow Man also provides tips on how to spot gold diggers and his own dating experiences in the land of denim and brown shoes.


An excerpt from the book is below.

The oldest question in the universe. Why are Dutch women so loud?

During the times of the Roman empire, the medical establishment back in Rome were alarmed by the number of cases of soldiers having to leave the service of the military early due to loss of hearing. This had become a growing problem for those based in the region known as Germania Inferior, the southern part of which would later become what we now know as the Netherlands. It became clear that the women in that part of the Roman Empire were so loud that they were causing hearing problems for men not used to the high pitched shrieking common to the natives of that country. It was for this reason the Romans invented earplugs.

Shouting woman

The oldest question

Thousands of years later, the name of the country may have changed, but the shouting continues. Dutch women, whose voices due to years of smoking can be quite sultry and sexy, have a habit of raising their voices by several decibels when grouped together. It’s a little known fact that most waiters and waitresses in cafes wear earplugs in order to protect themselves from hordes of women shouting their toiletry intentions at the top of their voices, or screaming at levels similar to a plane at takeoff while swiping through Tinder with their friends.

The reasons for this phenomena is explained in the ebook The Shallow Man Guide to Dating the Dutch also available from

No ear, nose and throat specialists were hurt during the writing of this post.


Dating the Dutch

Based on 10 years of dating in the Netherlands